Tagged: Hooligan

The Wild Turkey.

The Connie: Sammy! I’m on trail and guess what! Guess what Hooligan saw!

Daughter: What trail? I have no idea what you are going to tell me.

The Connie: He saw a wild turkey! He was going in the bush and he jumped and it was wild turkey.  And I was like, it was wild turkey like oh my gosh! And then the turkey was gone and we saw an egg. So I covered the egg to protect it. And then he went to the bush and it slithered and it was snake! But the snake was faster than him. A snake Sammy!

The Mormons.

[Calling me at the office]

Daughter: Hello.

The Connie: Sammy! Sammy!! Dude!!!

Daughter: Hello mother.

The Connie: Hooligan got pet by a Mormon today!

Daughter: What? Did you say a Mormon?

The Connie: Yes, like Romney.  They are not so bad you know.

Daughter: How did you know they were Mormons?

The Connie: Well it’s obvious dude! They were dressed neat, and had a white shirt and black tie.

Daughter: So you don’t actually know if they were Mormon.

The Connie: No I do. I asked them. I said, “Are you a Mormon?” And they said yes and I let them pet Hooligan.

The Rolling Dog.

The Connie: Hooligan was at the big park today. And he roll himself on the grass.  Then we went by later and he roll it again!

Daughter: Well, he is a dog.

The Connie: But it’s yucksy pooey with goose poops there! SO I had to wash him. And I took a big bottle of water and wash him in the parking lot. People were all staring and taking photos. But I don’t care cause I don’t want a goose poops in my car.

Daughter: Only vodka in your car, right?

The Connie: Yes, only vodka.